Post by valuecard on Jan 11, 2009 3:56:42 GMT -5
Hi guys. I’ve been eager to express my views about what I see a big form of rebellion amongst Christians – namely the idolatry of relationships. What I mean by that is so many Christians considering finding a husband or a wife or such a high priority in their walk that it OFTEN becomes an idol, and thus becomes sin against their saviour. I am speaking from experience here too as I will explain later. First let me define what I mean by Idolatry. When God speaks against Idols in the bible, He is not just talking about statues of stone and wood. God makes it clear in His word, that idol’s can be ‘idols of the heart’. That is, things that you exalt to such a high degree, that God’s will seemingly has to bend around your idol so that your can stay just the way it is, the way you like it. Relationships can be exactly that.
Ezekiel 14:3 Son of man, these men have set up their idols in their heart, and put the stumbling block of their iniquity before their face: should I be enquired of at all by them?
So we can see Idols can be things you esteem in your heart. And what effect does the idol in your heart have on God? It crushes Him!
Ezekiel 6:9 Because I was crushed by their adulterous heart which has departed from Me, and by their eyes which play the harlot after their idols.
The idol I want to talk about is relationships, but to give you a brief and simpler analogy, the idol itself may not be something sinful (as being in a relationship and getting married is not a sin), but its your worship or covetousness of it, that makes it a sin against God. For example, sports is not a sin, but if you talk and think about sports more than about God, and if your willing to skip your commitments as a Christian so you don’t miss a big game on tv – well that is a cut and dry example of Idolatry because God wants to be first in all things.
So why and how are relationships Idolatrous? Well first and foremost I am speaking from personal experience when I was in a relationship where I started at the beginning being 100% convinced that God was in it and that it was God’s will for me to be with this girl. By the end I had fallen far from God’s will, as it turned out that I ended up wanting to be with this person regardless of whether it was God’s will or not – and when you reach that point – then you can be sure you have committed Idolatry (as I had) and denied God who is above.
Now these are just my observations from being in and moving around Christian circles through the years. It seems like almost every Christian I meet has a major goal of finding their soul mate, or ‘the one God has for them’. There is nothing sinful about that, but bear in mind that the bible doesn’t teach that God has someone for everyone. What the issue here is the amount of “asking, seeking and knocking” that Christians put into the pursuit of their partner. I have seen examples of people who think, pray and seek more after a husband or a wife than they do after the souls of their lost family and friends! If that’s you, then that is a big warning sign that your desire for a relationship has become an idol! Are you someone who trying to do God’s will so that He will reward you with that perfect someone? If so, then that’s a terrible motive! Consider your ways.
Secondly, whilst getting married is not a sin in God’s sight, I truly don’t know any Christians who are happily married. This is not to say there aren’t happily married Christians couples out there doing the will of God, but I can think of three clear examples of people I know where either the husband is one fire for God and the wife is not (or vice versa), and to hear the grief that this situation brings the Christian who is on fire for God is so heart breaking. I’ve heard tales from friends who get so much grief from their other half, e.g. while they are out winning souls and living out God’s will, their other half see’s this as a threat to their relationship because they accuse the person of caring more about their ministry than about their spouse!
A TEST!
If your a Christian who is not married but is in a relationship with someone, truly ask yourself these questions – do spend more time in prayer since you’ve been going out with this person or less time in prayer? Have You been reading the bible more since you’ve been seeing this person, or have you been reading the bible less? Do you spend more time thinking about this person than about God? Do you get more excited about receiving affection from this person or from God? If the answer is favours your boyfriend or girlfriend in any of these questions – then you need to ask if you think God has really sent this person into your life? Why would God give you someone who, by being with them, results in you spending LESS time and having LESS intimacy with Jesus?! Remember that God is a Jealous God and He zealously covets our affection!
In addition to Idolatry, so many Christians, through the courting process, end up in some form of sexual sin or lustful behaviour. Again, from person experience I fell into this wicked transgression, and really, its just not worth offending God. If your with someone – set clear boundaries – and don’t cross them not for anything in the world!
In conclusion, what every believer who is seeking a spouse needs to realise is the clear biblical teaching on contentment – the bible repeatedly teaches to be content the way you are, and that covetousness is a sin!
Hebrews 13: 5
Let your conduct be without covetousness; be content with such things as you have.
Lets remember the bible teaches our priority should always be living for Christ, not seeking a spouse!
1 Corinthians 7: 29
But this I say, brethren, the time is short, so that from now on even those who have wives should be as though they had none, 30 those who weep as though they did not weep, those who rejoice as though they did not rejoice, those who buy as though they did not possess, 31 and those who use this world as not misusing it. For the form of this world is passing away. 32 But I want you to be without care. He who is unmarried cares for the things of the Lord—how he may please the Lord. 33 But he who is married cares about the things of the world—how he may please his wife.
When a relationship becomes an idol, and your willing to compromise your time with God for the sake of another person, remember we make ourselves into the people Jesus is speaking to in this scripture:
Revelation 2:4
Nevertheless I have this against you, that you have left your first love. 5 Remember therefore from where you have fallen; repent and do the first works, or else I will come to you quickly and remove your lampstand from its place—unless you repent.
I know what it feels like to be one of the people who really wants to find the person God has for them and I know the dangers it entails as I have fallen into them. By the grace of God I know also know the feeling of freedom of not coveting a spouse, because God has given me content to be single, separated to God, all the days of my life. I truly am “without care” regarding finding a spouse, as Paul said we all men should be (1 Cor 7:32). If God wills otherwise, then amen, but if things stay they way they are then Amen! Because the excitement and fulfilment of living out the Christian life that Jesus spoke of easily outweighs the benefits of having a loving spouse.
Thanks for taking the time to read right through
Bless you guys
Phil
PS on a diff topic, pls check out this clip i made what i rekon is the most convicting song about evangelism that ive ever heard (called "the field" by claire hazzard)
its at
au.youtube.com/watch?v=txiFBfenTHo
or at
au.youtube.com/user/valuecard2
Ezekiel 14:3 Son of man, these men have set up their idols in their heart, and put the stumbling block of their iniquity before their face: should I be enquired of at all by them?
So we can see Idols can be things you esteem in your heart. And what effect does the idol in your heart have on God? It crushes Him!
Ezekiel 6:9 Because I was crushed by their adulterous heart which has departed from Me, and by their eyes which play the harlot after their idols.
The idol I want to talk about is relationships, but to give you a brief and simpler analogy, the idol itself may not be something sinful (as being in a relationship and getting married is not a sin), but its your worship or covetousness of it, that makes it a sin against God. For example, sports is not a sin, but if you talk and think about sports more than about God, and if your willing to skip your commitments as a Christian so you don’t miss a big game on tv – well that is a cut and dry example of Idolatry because God wants to be first in all things.
So why and how are relationships Idolatrous? Well first and foremost I am speaking from personal experience when I was in a relationship where I started at the beginning being 100% convinced that God was in it and that it was God’s will for me to be with this girl. By the end I had fallen far from God’s will, as it turned out that I ended up wanting to be with this person regardless of whether it was God’s will or not – and when you reach that point – then you can be sure you have committed Idolatry (as I had) and denied God who is above.
Now these are just my observations from being in and moving around Christian circles through the years. It seems like almost every Christian I meet has a major goal of finding their soul mate, or ‘the one God has for them’. There is nothing sinful about that, but bear in mind that the bible doesn’t teach that God has someone for everyone. What the issue here is the amount of “asking, seeking and knocking” that Christians put into the pursuit of their partner. I have seen examples of people who think, pray and seek more after a husband or a wife than they do after the souls of their lost family and friends! If that’s you, then that is a big warning sign that your desire for a relationship has become an idol! Are you someone who trying to do God’s will so that He will reward you with that perfect someone? If so, then that’s a terrible motive! Consider your ways.
Secondly, whilst getting married is not a sin in God’s sight, I truly don’t know any Christians who are happily married. This is not to say there aren’t happily married Christians couples out there doing the will of God, but I can think of three clear examples of people I know where either the husband is one fire for God and the wife is not (or vice versa), and to hear the grief that this situation brings the Christian who is on fire for God is so heart breaking. I’ve heard tales from friends who get so much grief from their other half, e.g. while they are out winning souls and living out God’s will, their other half see’s this as a threat to their relationship because they accuse the person of caring more about their ministry than about their spouse!
A TEST!
If your a Christian who is not married but is in a relationship with someone, truly ask yourself these questions – do spend more time in prayer since you’ve been going out with this person or less time in prayer? Have You been reading the bible more since you’ve been seeing this person, or have you been reading the bible less? Do you spend more time thinking about this person than about God? Do you get more excited about receiving affection from this person or from God? If the answer is favours your boyfriend or girlfriend in any of these questions – then you need to ask if you think God has really sent this person into your life? Why would God give you someone who, by being with them, results in you spending LESS time and having LESS intimacy with Jesus?! Remember that God is a Jealous God and He zealously covets our affection!
In addition to Idolatry, so many Christians, through the courting process, end up in some form of sexual sin or lustful behaviour. Again, from person experience I fell into this wicked transgression, and really, its just not worth offending God. If your with someone – set clear boundaries – and don’t cross them not for anything in the world!
In conclusion, what every believer who is seeking a spouse needs to realise is the clear biblical teaching on contentment – the bible repeatedly teaches to be content the way you are, and that covetousness is a sin!
Hebrews 13: 5
Let your conduct be without covetousness; be content with such things as you have.
Lets remember the bible teaches our priority should always be living for Christ, not seeking a spouse!
1 Corinthians 7: 29
But this I say, brethren, the time is short, so that from now on even those who have wives should be as though they had none, 30 those who weep as though they did not weep, those who rejoice as though they did not rejoice, those who buy as though they did not possess, 31 and those who use this world as not misusing it. For the form of this world is passing away. 32 But I want you to be without care. He who is unmarried cares for the things of the Lord—how he may please the Lord. 33 But he who is married cares about the things of the world—how he may please his wife.
When a relationship becomes an idol, and your willing to compromise your time with God for the sake of another person, remember we make ourselves into the people Jesus is speaking to in this scripture:
Revelation 2:4
Nevertheless I have this against you, that you have left your first love. 5 Remember therefore from where you have fallen; repent and do the first works, or else I will come to you quickly and remove your lampstand from its place—unless you repent.
I know what it feels like to be one of the people who really wants to find the person God has for them and I know the dangers it entails as I have fallen into them. By the grace of God I know also know the feeling of freedom of not coveting a spouse, because God has given me content to be single, separated to God, all the days of my life. I truly am “without care” regarding finding a spouse, as Paul said we all men should be (1 Cor 7:32). If God wills otherwise, then amen, but if things stay they way they are then Amen! Because the excitement and fulfilment of living out the Christian life that Jesus spoke of easily outweighs the benefits of having a loving spouse.
Thanks for taking the time to read right through
Bless you guys
Phil
PS on a diff topic, pls check out this clip i made what i rekon is the most convicting song about evangelism that ive ever heard (called "the field" by claire hazzard)
its at
au.youtube.com/watch?v=txiFBfenTHo
or at
au.youtube.com/user/valuecard2